the main room
I've been searching your corridors for generations
looking for a clue to take me to you
All this time
you were right here
waiting for me in the main room.
to be me
I gave this woman - all of me.
I gave you all that I could be,
But too soon came to realise
The cost of my sacrifice,
You abuse me.
Some men will never understand
The power of a gentle hand,
That only weak men raise a fist
To bruise the lips they should have kissed,
You bruised me.
I used to love you, long ago,
Before you let your true self show,
The monster in a man's disguise,
I came to see though fear filled eyes,
I freed me.
This enigmatic entity
Now seeks her lost identity,
Reluctant gives what she must give,
And selfish, keeps enough to live,
To be me.
I face a monumental task
To heal myself, how dare you ask
That I stand with you while you mend?
I have a broken heart to tend,
It needs me.
In dark, unchartered chasms find,
The childhood hurts which haunt your mind.
However much you would forget,
They smart and fester in you yet,
And scarred me.
There are some memories I dare,
To bring from deep within and share,
But some are mine alone to know
Inside the maze I have to go,
To find me.
The roles I act out in life's play
Are unrehearsed, so, day by day,
I stumble through my many parts,
A mere beginner in the arts,
That stage me.
For each occasion, every place,
I now affect the fitting face,
Pretend a self sufficiency
And there, behind the mask you see,
Protect the frail remains of ME!
my belly exposed
I sleep with my shirt pulled up and my belly exposed
In the dark, beneath the covers, where no one can see
My belly breaths. I envy and am surprised by those
Who say eating a peanut show, forms a bulge in the skin.
Mine is hollow, a ball, a vacuum, that swallows the world
Capable of consuming the stars, a place where everything
Swims in a darkness that never ends. I beat you out a rhythm
A dull thud like sticks on a pillow, the muted march
Of one thought after another, one dream carried longer
Than is dared, a stone sitting on the surface of a lake
Falling without a trace into haunted places, kept alive
With imaginings of what could be lurking, rather than
What is, the flesh, the fat, the thickened bone, the muscles
That once moaned, the echo of a groan in a belly exposed.